Today is my birthday. I grew up being a little sheepish about admitting it was my birthday, but at this point, I’m fucking thrilled every year I’m alive and well.
And, each year, to honor this day, I write myself something between a letter and a status report, an accounting of sorts, of the previous year, and a forecast of habits and wishes and hopes in the year ahead.
But, there’s no need to wait until your birthday to do the same.
You might start by making an accounting of the last year of your writing and other creative work— did you write more than you hoped? Less? Why? What did you write? What did you want to write instead? What else did you hope to write? What took up the largest amount of time instead and meant you weren’t writing? What wonderful things happened that you didn’t expect? (For major inspo in terms of tracking various aspects of one’s writerly efforts, visit Ines Bellina’s Cranky Guide to Writing. She is rad, as is her Substack.)
Then, look ahead, and write a real accounting of where things stand in your life and how you wand them to look instead, if different.
And rather than setting goals to fill that gap, write the small, regular habits that you plan to bring into your life in the year ahead so that your next letter/report is more to your liking.
Because, look, “write a novel” can be on your to-do list all you like, but until you do small, incremental things like writing two pages today, it’s mostly going to stay on your list and keep staying the same distance away. The goal matters less than the decisions you’re making each day to get there.
Then— and this is sometimes the hardest part— I like to think/write a bit about who I need to be in order to do those things. I don’t mean trying to change who I fundamentally am (as if!), but more in terms of being really honest with myself about what I need to work on personally. That might mean getting very honest with myself about where I need to do better about managing anxiety, or about what I might need to subtract or delegate or otherwise manage differently, or even about a new habit/practice I need to bring into my life.
What’s important here is that all of it is coming from you and not from anyone else’s expectations you might be channelling as your own. For at least the time it takes to do this exercise, fuck what your parents think, fuck what your spouse thinks, to hell with what society makes you feel like you should be doing or showing up, definitely fuck internalized sexism or ageism, and everyone else and write only about what your heart deeply wants, consequences be damned. Take as much space as you want with this part.
When you have finished to your satisfaction, put those daily tasks on your calendar so you can theoretically do them and turn them into regular habits, then mark the date for a year from now or six months from now or in the next quarter, or whatever time from now, to do this all over again to keep yourself on track in a way that feels like you’re on top of it, but not obsessing. That part is important.
Also important: be open to things on your list showing up in ways that surprise you, are out of order from how you’ve planned, that don’t initially look like you might have envisioned them. And, frankly, give yourself the grace to shift and grow and change your damn mind when you want to. You’re your own source of power, so you get to shift all of this anytime you want. You alone get to decide that.
Cheers to the year ahead.